Next time you’re sitting in a meeting room or staring at a grid of video boxes, step back from the agenda for a moment. Really look at the participants. Each person carries their own thoughts and worries into that space, chewing on issues that have nothing to do with quarterly targets or project milestones.
The surface story usually goes like this: You see Daniel fidgeting with his laptop, prepping his presentation. The conference room still smells faintly of expensive cleaning product — somehow pleasant rather than chemical. Sunshine streams warmly through the windows. Then the meeting starts and everyone focuses on every word, every comma, every data point. Emotions are inconvenient in business. We all know this. Which is exactly why these sessions exhaust everyone — we’d rather hold back, hide, stay serious. Keep up appearances.
The hidden story runs deeper. Daniel just finished a phone call with his father, who’s struggling with how to care for his wife’s advancing dementia. Daniel wants to help but doesn’t know how. His head swirls with “what if” questions that he’s shoving down his throat in these final seconds before clicking to slide one.
If we could actually see Daniel and the others — really hear the voices in their heads — we might feel something like empathy. We might listen differently. Discuss with more compassion.
It only takes one person to start.
This post started in German on reinergaertner.de — yes, 1997, I’ve been doing this a while. The translation was AI-assisted. Any remaining awkwardness is authentically bilingual.